Total Waaagh! – Part 4

Well here we are at the end of week 3 of the great annual Orktober painting battle between the Imperial Rebel Ork and myself. After IRO’s storming start to the month and my fairly dismal performance in week 2 a lot of people will have sensibly written me off so it’s time to come back swinging.

First of all we have this clanking, smoke-belching, rusty monstrosity; a Killa Kan. I’d quite like to add a whole squad of these to the army this month but we’ll see how it goes.

Next, another ork boy…

…and another of the new Beastsnaggas.

Lastly we have a couple of the new Kommandos. Have I mentioned how much I like these models? I like them a lot! This boy is ready to smash the door and unleash havoc!

Whilst his mate is a vicious knife-fighter, and he’s ready to get all stabby!

So let’s see what that all adds up to. To keep things (relatively) fair we’re using a scoring system which you can find out all about here. As a vehicle the Killa Kan is worth 2 points, whilst each of the orks (plus Varag Ghoul-Chewer who got his own post earlier in the week) is worth 1 point each, making this week worth a total of 7 points. Add that to the 5 points I scored in week 1 and the 2 I scored in week 2 and we find ourselves with a grand total of 14 points with just over a week left to go. IRO still has a lead on me but I’m back in the game (note “in” not “on”) and there’s still everything to play for as we hurtle towards November and our cataclysmic showdown.

Varag Ghoul-Chewer

I think I promised that this month was going to be all about Orks with a “K” but needless to say an Orc has rudely barged in anyway. The infamous Blood Bowl star player Varag Ghoul-Chewer has been on the edge of my painting desk since last Orctober and I finally faced the fact that he’s not going to paint himself – impressive though that might be – so I’d better get on with it myself. Anyway, he’s done now – rival sportsmen beware!

Incidently, those of you who’re viewing this through the WordPress reader may find that some of the pictures are strangely outsized and distorted. I presume this is yet another case of WordPress deciding to make work for themselves and irritate their users by finding something that ain’t broke and attempting to fix it anyway, bless ‘em. If the problem doesn’t resolve itself soon I’ll look into seeing if there’s anything I can do at my end – in the meantime the website doesn’t appear to be affected so if it bothers you (and it should!) please go to convertordie.wordpress.com and look at the posts there.

Anyway, time to get back to the 41st Millennium!

Total Waaagh! – Part 3

Oh dear, oh dear – not so much progress this week; IRO is going to thrash me this year if I’m not careful! For those who don’t know (where have you been?!) I’m currently involved in an Ork painting contest with fellow blogger, the inimitable IRO, and frankly I’m going to need to get my bum in gear before it turns into a rout. Still, some progress is better than no progress and I’ve been working on a few Orks this week – although sadly I’ve only actually finished two of them.

First of all we have this battle-scarred Beast Snagga (the new “not Snakebites” that Games Workshop added to the Ork range last year).

Sneaking up behind him we have this Ork Kommando (finished after I snuck in some late night painting last night).

So yeah, not loads this week but I do have a lot more Orks on the desk so hopefully next week will be more productive. IRO is pulling out quite the impressive lead on me I think so I’m going to have to really crack on in the second half of the month.

Total Waaagh! – Part 2

Well, here we are – one week into Orktober already and it’s time to take a look at how I’m getting on in my now annual struggle to the death against fellow blogger IRO. (Can one have an annual struggle to the death? I’m going to say yes…).

First up we have this ugly brute, and his mighty squig-hog! I’m not sure you can call this a conversion as I didn’t add anything to him, but I did leave quite a lot off. The original model was a bit too busy I felt, with lots of extra armour, grots hanging on and so forth, and I preferred a more slimmed down look.

Meanwhile this Ork Nob started out as one of the single-pose models from the Assault on Black Reach set but I decided to make him a bit more interesting by chopping off his arms and replacing them, and giving him a new head into the bargain.

In the past I’ve talked about my mixed feelings in regards to the new ork boys kit. I really wish it was easier to kitbash them to create a rag-tag horde of unique models – but on the other hand they do make for cracking miniatures straight out of the box. This one is a particular favourite.

And speaking of cool models, last but not least we have this Kommando.

By my count the Squig-hog rider is worth 2 points and the other 3 models are 1 point each so I’m currently looking at a score of 5 in my contest against IRO (find our “rules”, such as they are, listed here). The coming week is looking pretty busy and I’m going to be working through this weekend so progress is likely to be slow but at least I’m off to a solid start.

Progress Report – September 2022

Oi, watz dis den? Fort dis was supposed to be Orktoba – what chew doin’ talkin’ abart fings from ova mumfs den?

Settle down greenies – because before we sink our teeth (or should that be “teef”?) into Orktober it’s time to take a look back at everything I’ve managed to paint over the last quarter-year. Back in June I talked a bit about my efforts to clear out the backlog of unpainted models that I’ve accrued over the years and the way in which my attitude towards it has changed in 2022. Rather than reiterate everything here I’d recommend going back and seeing what I have to say for myself by clicking here.

Usually August and September is one of the most productive times of year for me on the hobby front but lately life and work have been kicking my arse a fair bit and the time and energy needed for painting miniatures has been in short supply. Still, you know what they say – the cost of living may be high but it’s still better than the alternative! Anyway, I’ve not been entirely absent from the painting desk so let’s take a look back at everything I’ve managed to achieve towards my various goals.

Warcry

Since last we looked back we’ve had a new edition of the game and three new warbands so, given that this was where I achieved the most in the first half of the year, you’d expect the hype from GW to have translated into more models ready for the tabletop at my end. Well you’d expect wrong wouldn’t you…

Terrain

Last time around I think I made some rumblings about working on some 40k/Necromunda terrain but alas that’s still to happen. I did however knock out this ominous shrine to the Dark Gods…

…and a whole load of fences too.

Warhammer 40k/Kill Team

Next to naff all done on this front, although with the coming month being dedicated to all things Orky hopefully I’ll be able to redress the balance a bit.

Blood Bowl

I’m pleased to say this is where the real progress was made over the last few months, with four new teams hitting the pitch.

First of all we had the Necromantic Horrors…

…followed swiftly (or at least as swiftly as they could manage being dead and all) by the Shambling Undead.

Then just a week or so ago I finished off my mob of rambunctious Goblins as well.

And finally, with the month almost out, I surprised myself by cannibalising my Goblins – and various others – and putting together a team of Underworld Denizens as well.

Necromunda

Despite bold claims that I would get my Orlock gang painted, or at least started, over the last few months the brave lads from the House of Iron are still notably absent from the underhive. All was not entirely lost though, I did make a start on a gang of outcast hive scum, disreputable down-and-outs ready to scratch a living on the fringes of society by any means necessary.

Aeronautica Imperialis/Adeptus Titanicus

I’m rolling these two into one because I’ve made absolutely zip progress on either. Battles between mighty titans would be so damn awesome wouldn’t they? Alas, the god-engines – and the tiny planes for that matter – must wait for another day.

Blackstone Fortress 

With just days to go I finally got myself in gear and painted up the Zoat from Blackstone Fortress. This means we now have a whole new expansion we can play through, Deadly Alliance, and a galumphing alien quadruped to help us take on the sinister creatures that haunt the fortress. There’s still plenty more to do though before I can call the game, and all of its expansions, complete at last.

Cursed City 

Less progress here than I would have liked (that’s becoming a bit of a recurrent refrain this time around isn’t it) but all is not entirely lost; I did manage to complete the creepy wizard Octren Glimscry. Better than nothing right?

A Song of Ice and Fire 

I’ve got two armies on the go here; one for the Starks and one for the Lannisters. My plan is to get each of them up to about 30 points then keep building them up in 10 point increments. So far progress on the Lannisters has been slow, but I did manage to get the Mountain’s Men ready to march out under the command of the brutal Ser Gregor Clegane.

The Starks have managed to drum up more troops however, perhaps the men of the north are a bit more loyal to their liege lords or perhaps they’re just easier to paint. Either way we’re now just one squad off making that 30 point target so I think that, no matter what else the rest of the year holds, I’d like to try and get that done before 2022 is out.

Hate

I didn’t manage much from the world of Hate, but then it wasn’t really a priority. I did however manage to knock out a couple of tree-zombies from the tribe of Sarrassa, and a giant from the tribe of Um’Kator, which you can see in all their close up glory here.

Goals and Summing Up

Back in June I set myself a bunch of goals for this quarter so the last thing we have to do is take a look back and see which I managed to achieve – and which I failed at entirely!

Necromunda – get another gang up and running, most likely the Orlocks. More if possible.

I’m going to be generous to myself and count this as a win. I may not have painted any Orlocks but my little gang of scum are ready to take on whatever the Underhive can throw at them.

Warcry – get at least one of the “core” warbands painted, the Spire Tyrants look like a good option here.

Failed. Despite my very best of intentions the Spire Tyrants still sit looking forlorn and unpainted and the fighting pits of the Varanspire remain ominously quiet.

Blood Bowl – get the Necromantic Horrors team finished. As that only needs 2 ghouls I’m going to aim for getting another team up and running as well.

Smashed it! Not only did I get the Necromantic Horrors painted but three other teams as well. Consider my back patted!

Blackstone Fortress – complete at least one expansion.

He may only be one model but that Zoat is enough to allow us to play the Deadly Alliance expansion so this one is definitely a win!

Cursed City – make significant progress. Hard to quantify on this one, I’d love to get it finished of course but I’m not going to try to bite off more than I can chew. A squad or two of mooks and/or some of the heroes would count here, whereas a single corpse rat just isn’t going to cut it!

He’s got slightly more panache than a corpse rat but Octren Glimscry is still just one model so I’m going to say I failed to make significant progress here.

ASOIAF – make significant progress. Again I’m not going to put an exact figure on it here, just that I want to get something done and again one model isn’t enough!

With two squads completed (the Stark Bowmen and the Mountain’s Men) I think I can call this one a win with significant progress on both my armies.

Overall then it’s been a bit of a mixed bag but despite having a lot less time to work with than I’d hoped I still managed to get a fair bit done so I’m happy enough. So, how about my goals for the final three months of the year? Well to be honest with you, I’m cautious of setting myself up to fail so I’m going to avoid putting myself forward for anything too demanding. There is a hell of a lot going on in “real life” for me right now (as demonstrated by how long it takes me to reply to comments here – let alone read and comment on the work of all my blog-buddies out there. Love ya anyway guys, keep up the good work!). Over the next few weeks I’m going to be all about Orktober and after that, who knows? The list of projects above remains my priority so I’ll keep chipping away at them as and when I can. There are two tasks however which I’m going to try to give special attention.

Necromunda

Get some Orlocks painted. Even if it’s not a full gang. Even if it’s just one dude with a handlebar moustache and a devil-may-care attitude lets get something done here at last.

A Song Of Ice And Fire

One more squad will get me a 30 point Stark army up and running so that would a nice thing to achieve. Let’s send a clear message to King Joffrey that the men of Winterfell won’t bend the knee to him or anyone else!

Of course in a perfect world I’ll paint much, much more than this but I really have no idea how things are going to go over the next little while – I might get quite a lot done but equally I might manage next to nothing, it’s that kind of time. Watch this space I guess. In the meantime though, it’s time for me to paint some angry green dudes!

Total Waaagh! – Part 1

The boundary between reality and the Warp shivered and bulged before, with a flatulent squelch, tearing itself open. Like a goblet of phlegm coughed up by the green gods themselves the space hulk Wurldbreaka tore free of the immaterium and thundered back into real space. Cut off from their natural home, the daemons which had been attacking the ship began to collapse, wailing and giggling, their unnatural forms crushed by the uncaring hand of harsh physics. Down in the bowels of his ship Mad-Boss Murdakk da Mighty put aside his favourite shoota, giving a last idle kick towards the dissolving carcass of a thing with many eyes and wings which had, until a moment before, been trying to tear off his face with it’s many suckered hands.

“Roight!” he said to no-one in particular, “Let’s find out where we are den!”. All around the ship still echoed to the sounds of wailing grots, decompressing metal and the sudden cracks and bangs as overenthusiastic boys fired a last few shots at dying daemons or their slower and duller-witted mates. Murdakk smiled contentedly to himself. He’d heard that the Imperium, cowardly gits that they were, used a thing called a Geller Field when transversing the Warp in order to keep their ships from being overrun by the howling creatures of Chaos. “Sounds roight borin’ to me”, he muttered, “Gettin’ to fight dose weird gits is da best part of space travel. No wonder humies are weak”.

He turned to Bashem, his second in command. Bashem had all the qualities Murdakk liked in a first officer – being both hard of thinking and an expert in the field of shouting.

“Let’s get to da bridge, find out where we are. I’ve got a good feelin’ about this one!”

+++

“Kaptain on da bridge!” yelled Flickit the grot, smirking to himself as he spotted the predicament of Bugelit, the Mad Boss’s personal grot-herald. Caught quite literally with his pants down, Bugelit hopped desperately back from the drops and reached his station just in time to burst into a rousing chorus of Murdakk’s famous anthem. “Mad-boss, Mad-boss, whatcha going to do? Whatcha going to do when he yurk…”.

“Shaddap,” Murdakk muttered, squashing the little grot flat with one armoured boot. “You”, he jabbed a finger at Flickit, “New Bugelit. Clean dat up!”. Parking his massive bulk in the Kaptain’s chair he growled “Get sensors online”. At once a fearful grot scurried to throw open the shutters and allow the assembled orks to see out through the window.

“Enhance da image”. Obligingly a mob of sweating grots pushed the Mad-Boss closer to the window.

Ahead lay a planet shrouded in dark clouds of filthy smog, the atmosphere occasionally lit by flashes of green lighting. Looking straight down from their vantage-point in the heavens the Orks could see a city directly beneath them, it’s rusty towers emerging from leaning mounds of junk, it’s outer walls ringed by roadways littered with burned out wrecks and its scrap-lined streets busy with the distant figures of thousands of orks.

“I fort so”, the big ork growled. “I’d recognise dat pit anywhere! New Ork Leans! We’re back boys!”

“Fort you said we wur goin’ where da best fightin’ is?” said Furst Mate Bashem uncertainly. Murdakk treated his old buddy to his friendliest scowl. “Don’t you worry mate”, he declared, “We’ve found it!”

Well here we are, another year older and not a bit wiser and it’s time once again for Orktober and my now annual Ork painting challenge vs fellow blogger and all-round top-bloke the Imperial Rebel Ork. IRO has already been hard at work putting together his awesome kitbashes, including laying the foundations of the great greenskin fortress known as New Ork Leans. Meanwhile I’ll be trying to clear my way through more of the heap of unpainted models that have been gathering dust on and around my painting desk. Some of my unpainted orks date back more than a decade so for now the focus of my efforts has switched from “Convert or Die” to “Clear The Backlog or Else!”. Last year I battered through 37 greenskins of various shapes and sizes (and bizarrely enough, so did IRO).

This year I’m aiming to focus on my Warhammer 40k Ork army, although there might be the odd fantasy Orc sneaking in here and there. I’ve been working on this army since the mid-2000s, they were my first 40k army and they’re still probably my favourite faction. Of course a side-effect of this is that there’s a lot of models that have fallen by the wayside and never got the paint they deserved. A month or so IRO posted an inventory of all his Orks so far, which inspired me to look back and do the same thing. Here’s the total fighting strength of my Murda Boyz after almost two decades of recruiting.

1 Warboss

2 Big Meks In Mega Armour

1 Weirdboy

Ghazghkull Thraka (and Makari of course)

105 Ork Boys

22 Gretchin

2 Runt herds

2 Painboys

7 Burna Boys

5 Lootas

16 Nobs

4 Meganobs

5 Stormboyz (although these really need repainted and rebased)

1 Nob riding on a Smasha Squig

3 Deffcoptas

1 Truck

1 Lobba (plus crew)

1 Deffdread

Total – 181 angry futuristic green gits

So what am I planning to paint over the coming month? Well, Orks mainly – I’ve dug out all the stuff I’ve assembled but never got around to painting and its a pretty sizable heap of gits; mostly infantry but also some vehicles, kans and bits of scenery. I don’t want to box myself in by committing to too many specifics but one model I will definitely be aiming to paint is this guy; Boss Snikrot.

I loved the background for him when I bought my first Ork codex, and loved the model even more when it was eventually released. I pre-ordered it with my (at the time very limited) funds and so its somewhat embarrassing that I never painted it. If this is the only model I complete this month I’m calling it a win (IRO may of course argue that this isn’t enough in to count as a win in and of itself and I still need to actually paint more models than him – don’t listen to him!).

That said, even Orks must adhere to the rules of war and this year we’ve structured things a little differently to make sure this cut-throat competition is as sporting as we can manage. Here’s IRO himself to explain how it all works.

This year, after much behind the scenes squabbling, long nights pondering over ancient scriptures and scrolls, debating with scholars and military tacticians we have come up with a new set of rules. 

Last year, quite simply, it was one model = one point. 

This year, still quite simple really, the point scoring system is as follows: 

One greenskin (grot, stormboy, nob etc) = one point 

One vehicle (buggy, trukk, Deff dredd etc) = two points 

One terrain piece (scatter terrain, tower etc) = three points

Anyway, needless to say I’m dead excited about Orks right now, and that’s been translating into a desire to paint something green and mean. On the other hand I wanted so save my Orks for Orktober (somewhat counter-intuitively because the aim is to get my backlog painted not leave it sitting there but go with me here). Instead I wanted to paint something Orky, something that would fit into my Ork army, but not something that I could paint a few days from now and count towards the contest. What a conundrum eh! Luckily I knew exactly which model would fit the bill – a mean little git who’s most definitely not an Ork, in fact he’s a thorn in the side of Orks everywhere; da Red Gobbo.

Da Red Gobbo first appeared back in 1998 where he led the Gretchin Revolutionary Committee in the game Gorkamorka, his goal nothing less than throwing off the shackles of oppression for gretchin everywhere, raising the flag of revolution in every Ork camp and putting the bigger greenskins in their place once and for all. He returned with a limited edition model for Christmas 2020 (which I chose not to buy, feeling it was bit on the pricey side) and another for Christmas 2021 which I caved and snapped up.

I remember when he was announced enjoying a quiet chuckle at the forced controversy that sprang up online, especially in those parts of the internet where people refuse to just enjoy themselves. Either he was very offensive because he mocks Communism (something that must never be the butt of a joke comrade – workers of the world unite!) or he was very offensive because he mocks Communism (something which is no laughing matter – even to mention it without caveats about how dreadful it is places us on a short, slippery slope that ends in a Stalinist purge). Anyway, I think he’s pretty cool. Check this detail out for instance. This is the inside of the squig’s stomach.

That’s right, the sculptor has taken the time to add the various baubles that the greedy squig has eaten, even though no-one will ever see them on the painted model. That’s attention to detail! The one thing I’m not keen on about him is the Christmas theme – that’s a joke that only works on one day of the year and the Gretchin Revolution is for life not just for Christmas. I trimmed away all the Christmas elements, painted him in a more restrained style, and ended up with this. Vive la révolution!

Anyway, dat’s enough rabbitin’ on from me for one day – tomorrow we go to WAAAGH!

The Shadowland Lowlifes

The other day I was thinking about Blood Bowl teams and pondering how I could cheat and behave in a devious manner in order to achieve my aims (in this case to have lots of teams painted up and ready for a game). That’s when it struck me – if you want dastardly rascals look no further than the Underworld Denizens team; truly a bunch of scheming ne’er-do-wells if ever I saw them! For the uninitiated the Underworld’s teams are made up of a mixture of creatures which make their homes in dank caves deep beneath the earth and emerge only to play Blood Bowl before slinking back into the gloom. The team draws upon the dubious combined talents of goblins (of which I recently completed a team), snotlings (of which I have plenty already painted), skaven and a big guy such as a troll. In other words all I needed to do to get another Blood Bowl team up and running was paint a few rats – and having already painted hundreds of them for WHFB I reckoned that would be no bother.

Having poured over the rules for literally minutes, and applied my next-to-nonexistent knowledge of how the game is played, I concluded that the best thing to do would be to paint up one each of the available Skaven positions, starting with a gutter runner…

… a thrower…

… a stormvermin blitzer…

… and finally a lowly clanrat.

And just like that another team is formed and ready for sporting glory!

It’s been a while since I painted any Skaven so this was a refreshing reminder of how much I enjoy them. If only Games Workshop would do something to refresh the range in a serious way *hint-bloody-hint*. In the meantime though I might well come back to these furry little guys soon and turned them into a full blown Skaven team. Not yet though because the next little while is going to be all about the greenskins!

Blackstone Fortress: Zoat

Hands up everyone who thought we’d see another Zoat in our lifetimes? Anybody? Anybody at all? Yes, GW may have been willing to plunder their past over recent years, bringing back everything from Genestealer Cults to ambulls, even Squats, but I never seriously thought we’d see a Zoat again. And yet, here one is, ready to join the crew of adventurers in the depths of the Blackstone Fortress.

Wonders will never cease eh! It’s been a few years now since it was released and I still can’t quite believe it!

The Cheatin’ Gitz – Part 2

Last time we were on the Blood Bowl pitch I was working on my Goblin team. Now we’re back with the little green gits to paint up the final three (for now). These rascals come from the Forge World Killer Kontraptions set which I treated myself to a while back. First of all we have the rambunctious Ooligan…

… then the Pogoer (who’s head has been swapped for one from the Night Goblins)…

…and lastly the Doom Diver.

Add them to the various other Goblins I’ve painted lately and there’s a whole new team ready to go!

I reckon I’ve done pretty well with Blood Bowl over the last couple of month but, as regular readers will no doubt have guessed already, there’s still plenty more still to do.

House Stark – Part 5

Time to return to the battlefields of Westeros and add some long-range firepower to the armies of House Stark. Back in May I powered through a squad of Sworn Swords and found myself wondering if I could apply the same batch-painting technique to the Stark Bowmen as well. However batch-painting really isn’t my forte so its taken me until now to just roll up my sleeves and get on with it.

Once again there are lots of duplicate sculpts and the effort vs outcome ratio proved not to be worth the time required to make them all unique. Gathered together as a unit though I reckon they look not bad at all.

Once again painting these has emphasised to me how quick and straightforward to paint the Starks can be when I just get on with it. Whether this translates into more northmen soon however only time will tell…