Empires Will Rot

Over the past few weeks I’ve been taking the opportunity to review the new Chaos releases, specifically from the point of view of someone whose devotion to the Dark Gods lies not in the Old World, for which these models were intended, but in the grim darkness of 40k. As I’ve been rather distracted this week by my newly purchased Blightkings (really impressive kit ‘in the flesh’ by the way) and don’t have anything painted to show I’ll talk about the Glottkin instead, a frankly massive new kit which creates three Nurgle serving brothers. The question is, what can I add that’s not been said a million times already? In the parlance of the Internet “Obvious Great Unclean One is obvious”. Oh and “bloomin’ ‘eck, he’s huge!” (Oh dear, I went all faux cockney urchin there for a moment. Sorry folks, it appears your choice of commentary today is pseudo Oliver Twist or LOL Cats. How unfortunate for you).
Glottkin
(Image belongs to Games Workshop – not me; don’t sue!)

Seriously though, this is in essence the Great Unclean One model that people have been crying out for – so the question is, why isn’t it? To a serial converter like myself this kit looks great, buy a Great Unclean One and they throw a Chaos Lord and Sorcerer into the bargain. That, however, doesn’t really fit with Games Workshop’s current ‘What You See Is What You Get’ policy, whereby – in 40k at least – units without models are being shown the door faster than a baby with hooves in Altdorf (oh yeah, got a little topical Warhammer joke in there!). Of course the Great Unclean One does have a model, it just doesn’t really match modern standards, especially next to this monster.99120201024_theglottkin03

Nor is Nurgle under-represented in terms of special characters. With these new additions (and counting the three Glotkin separately) he stands at 8 just from the Warriors of Chaos – the other gods have 1 or 2 each. In fact all the non-Nurgle characters put together only come to 9. Throw in those from Tamurkhan and the ratio becomes 11 to 10. Not, I hasten to add, that I have anything against the other two brothers Glott, in fact they’re both rather cool miniatures which have so far been rather overshadowed by their larger brother, and as such overlooked by many reviewers (and – apparently – by their parents when it came to dishing out second helpings. And they say that growth hormones in meat doesn’t affect children’s development. Should have gone vegetarian Sonny-Jim!). The mage especially is cracking, both hideously mutated and clearly magical. His warrior brother is slightly less appealing – he looks like an attempt to recreate the original plastic Nurgle Lord (a modern classic) and yet ends up looking somewhat second-rate as a result of this comparison. As I said, he’s solid enough, but for me he’s the weak part of this release. Cool helmet though!

However you can’t miss what you’ve never had, so if this release had come minus the two siblings balanced on the big lad’s bonce and been sold as a Great Unclean One I reckon the rejoicing would have been much the same. Maybe there really are new Greater Daemons in the works (and this beast simply grew from a concept sketch and turned into a tripartite character along the way) or maybe there aren’t (in which case this is a way of releasing a Greater Daemon for arguably the best represented of the gods without resulting in too much complaining from fans of the other three). Time will tell.

In the meantime the Glottkin remains another cracking addition to the Chaos range and I look forward to seeing its corpulent bulk unleashed both in the End Times of Warhammer and (with suitable conversion) in the closing days of the Imperium of Man. Obviously its rather silly but then that’s part of the appeal of Warhammer, and I’m glad that they are unafraid to include the flamboyant, eccentric element that defines their style.

Finally I’m quite relieved to note that the wrecking ball attached to Ghurk hangs from a horn and not, as I thought when I saw the first blurry picture, from his nipple. Not that I’d put it past Chaos (although it’s a little more Slaanesh) but the thought of him shattering a fortress wall by jiggling his man boobs is rather disturbing. As Jervis Johnson always ended his articles in the old White Dwarf “On that thought I will leave you”.

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